Running Aweigh...

I am so back on the whole cult plan- and its hard this time around. I think it because- I am trying to NOT eat my activity points and I am logging over 50 a week - as my mileage is up, my weight lifting and core sessions are increasing, and, well, I am hungry! Its hard to live off of between 1500-1800 calories a day when your average workout burns over 800 calories according to the whole heart monitor Garmin set up.
By the way- I heart my Garmin. It lets me measure my heart rate, my pace, my mileage and my every calorie burned. Love it!!!

I am training on hills these days. Somehow my runs are averaging between 5-8 miles. I need to get in some 10-milers and by the end of July a 15-miler. I am trail running. Lots and lots of 40% grade hills- yep, the Garmin tells me so.

I am doing donkey kicks with resistance, walking lunges with weights, butt push-ups, ball squeezes and a bunch of other leg strengthening stuff to get ready to drag my aged, decrepit ass through a full marathon. Guess what, my butt is getting bigger- WTF?!? Its messing with how my jeans fit! I am hoping that as I burn fat- the big butt thing will diminish.

The good news - my abs are starting to have the little line down the middle and the lines are on both sides. I am still totally pudgy in the lower belly area, but that is what a few months of fat meds (steroids) and then just crazy eating (fries, snickerdoodles, wine, chips, etc.) - yes, I did let myself go. However, I am getting in 1000 crunches (yes, that is three zeros) a week, plus a whole bunch of planks, side-ups and other painful crap that seems to be doing the trick.

Sure, I still have some muffin top- but at least I am moving away from the full on wedding cakes I was sporting.

So, I figure another 15-20 pounds of fat gone and I am golden. Its just a whole lot more work now that I am older and lazier.

Counting Blessings

I am just feeling incredible gratitude for the things that are going well in my life. Sure, I am utterly sleep deprived as the Commander and LaLa Bean are alternating nights as toddler torturers who relentlessly interrogate use with demands of "mama, wat dis?". Their techniques are still immature, but they are well on their way with prying open our eyelids with sharp little fingers and the slow drip torture of a valve free sippy cup leaking milk onto my sleepy face night after relentless night.

That said, I feel totally lucky. Even after they pulled the doors off the wardrobes we had locked with "baby locks" and bolted the walls. They pulled the hinges off and now working on the bedroom door. Yet I still feel gratitude at getting to share the planet with these ringlet headed little MacGyver's.

Sure there is drama with the whole landlady thing- but you know what? Not really my drama. More to the point- I am refusing to make it my drama. I am not interested. I am not so freaked out about the lawsuit - really, ridiculous and pretty easily proved. The drama at the house- really, borderline harassment by the downstairs tenant who I have put on notice. No more messing with me or my family. Drama! Be Gone!

Best of all- I am really seeing the light at the end of what has been a seemingly endless dark marital tunnel. I am so grateful that sticking it out is starting to pay off.

If You Go Into the Woods Tonight....

You better not go alone.

So last night, I went on a fantastic run with my trusty gal pal Pisces. We left late because, as usual, I was hell of late getting to her house. But whatevah! we had at least two-hours of daylight and we were only running 6.5 miles.

Here is the thing Pisces and I get lost pretty much everytime we walk out the door.

So, despite having loaded a run onto the Garmin- we got lost. Technically, I don't think it was our fault- the trail that it appeared we needed to take was closed due to winter storm damage. Anyhoooo... there we were deep in the redwoods, it was getting dark and we had five miles behind us. Plus, the miles were a tad treachorous in places. What do do?

Run to the road. Oooops, that was actually a ways back. Then, we saw a lone runner. Let me tell you, the trails had been empty for the last part of our run- so this was a great site. Naturally, we approached him. He was a doll. He actually walked us out of the woods - I am thinking it was a couple of miles as we ended up with almost eight miles distance when all was said and done. He offered to walk or run us out and then drive us to our car- as we were not going to close to our trailhead.

Let me say, my hat is off to this guy, Good Sam(iritan). How totally awesome was it of him to take pitty on us? How lucky were we to not have to hike out to a road and call someone for a ride to our car- not that my cell phone worked where we were.

So, last night, I came home well after dark- dripping with icy sweat, covered with dirt and tired! I hopped into the tub for a quick soak and then the shrieking Bean was unceremoneously dropped into bed with me as she had quite understandably worked Zombie Dad's last nerve.

She did peel back her diaper and pee on the bed. Seriously, I wanted put her in the backyard. Instead, I cleaned up the mess, whispered a prayer of thanks she peed on ZD's side of the bed, and spent a night rubbing her forehead as she was tearful off and on most of the night. I got up at the crack of dawn- worked for a few hours and was back home by nine to start my family day.

I took the kids to the kindergym where we jumped on the trampoline, climbed the climbing wall and generally ran around together, then I dropped them at childwatch and worked out for almost two hours as they both did NOT want to leave- awesome!!! I fed them total junk food- they were so confused because usually on ZD gives them the "good" stuff, and we ran errands. Phew! Now I am at work- itching to hit the trails for another run.

I realize that running the Malibu Marathon has me feeling super motivated to get in great shape, lose weight and be ready for 26-plus miles mid-November. Jeez! Malibu - no slumpy marathon for me...

This Is So Not My Beautiful Life

First of all- adorable four inch wedge heels purchased in NYC last month - they will tear the calluses of your 30-plus mile running feet like no tomorrow. OMG- bleeding pain that caused the Commander to prostrate herself on the Costco floor and kiss my poor torn up feet. Actually, I think she just wanted to be closer to my fabulous shoes and cloaked it in empathy.

Anyhow, when did I become the mom who gets off work and takes the kids to dinner at Costco for the most fattening single giant portion ever? Its not like they actually eat more than a couple of gnats worth of food - and then, of course, I eat ALL my points in one serving. But then, I do get roughly 50 activity points a week - so, all is well. And, yes, we did need critical items like lox. Because that is, in fact, what my kids like for breakfast - butter toast and raw fish. I also needed tampons which I forgot and my feet hurt too much to walk back to get. Raw open wounds- and yes, I will still go running after I tape my feet back together.

My god, do I love those sticky faced, howler monkey loud kids of mine. They, naturally, scored yet another book. I find it hard to say no to the books. Other toys, no problem denying their plaintive pleas that promise utter joy and fulfillment. But come on, a book? The upside of my new office is that Zombie Dad is able to load up the bike trailer and ride the kids down for a visit. They were thrilled to tear apart my office. And delighted that I had prepared for their visit with a brightly colored bouncey ball of rubber bands and a magnetic mermaid paper doll kit for the white board. That is just how I roll. No fax machine or scanner- but hey, I have mermaids.

Now, I am laying in bed writing up three days of painstaking health indicator data research and analysis- thank god, for the epidemiologists in my life! Seriously, they saved my butt today on this project by giving me five year mortality rate data sets. See, I lead a thrilling life.

Zombie Dad is playing scrabble on his iphone talking to the Little Dog and is administering red wine for my wounded feet upon which the feral cat has laid his evil, pee spraying self.

OMG - grossness about to be reported. My home router was unplugged when I got home and logged on tonight. So I went to reboot it and plug it in- LaLa had pooped in the corner behind my credneza door. So friggin' gross.

How did I get here? Wasn't it like yesterday I was 19 listening to acoustic versions of Talking Heads songs at three AM on Sproul plaza with the infinite promises of romance and revolution?

The Cult Works

So.... as some of you know, I got lazy and thought that I could start eating whatever I wanted and that I would manage to control myself. Well, when it comes to food- I am like an alcoholic. I don't just eat one serving of chips. I don't just eat the once in a blue moon order of french fries. I seem to go from zero to one hundred when I start eating greasy, salty junk food. Its a slippery slope that then impacts my interest in exercising... I also tend to drink too much wine and then comes eating baguettes, cheese, etc.

So, I had a discussion with myself over the status of my weight and my misery at not being able to wear my adorable little Calvin Klein suit collection - the hard earned wardrobe prize at the end of the long weight loss journey. I hopped right back on the wagon, increased my mileage, and guess what? Today the cuts in my abdomen were back where I like them- visible to the naked eye.

I am starting to get the one that goes down the middle of my stomach- and I am old!!! I am also fitting more comfortably into my clothes. My tight, skinny jeans are a few more weeks away- but I am back in the game. This little diversion down the path of old habits was a great wake up call for me.

I have to stay on it. Food is my drug of choice. And, with two little kids, a thriving business, a distance running habit and a lot of life stress- I need to pay heed to how and what I eat. So, there you have it.

I have one more run to do to round out my week- but I logged almost thirty miles on an abbreviated running schedule this week. I had the office move and sick kid.

I am also going to run a full marathon in November- yes, people, the Malibu Marathon!!! Woohoo!

Freaking the F*&%Q Out

OMG- we are being sued. This has never ever happened to me before. We are being sued for damages to our former house in the tune to 5K. WTF? The biggest ticket is 2500 for using the wrong touch up paint- which was provided to us by the brain damaged girlfriend of the landlady. Uh, besides Berkeley rent control says repainting is part of the typical wear and tear after 18 months of residency we were there for two years. There is all kinds of wack stuff- including repairs we asked them to make for 12-months- I am not so worried about those as we sent them registered letters. They are also charging us for cleaning the floors and rugs after we paid 1500 to have a professional service do so- again, all documented.

I have PMS, I just lost 8-hours of hard work- I am freaking the F**&! out. I have never ever been sued.

I guess we will play hardball. I have documentation, the place was visited two weeks before we moved by a social worker who signed off (they are claiming all kinds of mad inhabitility stuff- which clearly a CPS worker would have picked up on. Uh no, we did not have maggots, thank you very much!).

OK, deep breath. Calm down, its going to be OK. I have never been in court as a defendant before. I figure Calvin Klein suit, documentation up the ass, phone records where we called landlay, texts, emails, and certified letters. I have notes about the times they called us asking for rent, when the brain damaged girlfriend had already deposited it. I also have the list of things they claim we damaged with letters (again, certified) requesting repairs. We can document how they started to stop repairs after we protested them cutting the yard in half and putting in an apartment underneath us without any reduction in rent.

I can subpeona the professional cleaners, the rug guys, the floor guys, the haulers, etc.

What a pain in the ass. Not to mention we don't have an extra 5K laying around. Uh, we don't have that kind of money at all.

Again, freaking out.

Sucking It Up Saturdays

So.... another night of evil nocturnal toddler misadventures had me finally passing LaLa off to Zombie Dad around 4:30AM so that I could get some sleep. I had scheduled a run at 6:15AM- but it was not going to happen.

I did "wake up slow" as the Commander would say- which entailed coffee, snuggling, skyping and gently rousing myself from the command center of our bed. The kids, the dog and the feral cat joined in the antics. We 'knuggled', skyed my folks, read Harry the Dirty Dog, petted the Little Dog's nose, giggle, kissed noses, hid under the blankets, shared sippy cups and coffee.

Now, I am in the office following a later than planned run. I am rounding up my first week back in the cult and training. I will be updating my progress on Tuesdays- as its my official cult day. However, so far, so good. I have about ten pounds to go before those small six and big size four suits are comfortable- but I did log three 6-milers (two on hills and one with the double stroller this week; a slew of crunches and stayed within my points allowance without touching my activity points).

My goal is get an 8-miler in tomorrow and a 5-miler on Monday -- which will bring my total up to 29 miles this week. Not great, but not too bad. I slacked three days this week with overwork, the office move and sick babies. Lately, its been tough to run with less than four hours of sleep. Plus, I have to get on my stretching and weightlifting and soon!

Here is my program for the new WW week:

Points daily plus week allowance nary an activity point. I earn between 35-65 activity points a week.

T- DAY OFF (on the road)
W- 6-7 miles w/stroller/gym
T-6-8 hills
F-5 miles/speed and gym
S-6-8 hills
S-8-10 trail/gym
M-3-5 miles/gym

Totals 34-43 miles/4X-gym

We will see if I can pull it off. I have god awful PMS and this assertive training plan should help me hold it together.

So I am knocking off the crappy nutritional habits I was picking up- eating the kids goldfish; having too many "special" treats in the form of high fat, high cal no real nutritional content; drinking way too much wine; eating meals in the car purchased at the gas station; and being mindless. I am all about the journaling and back to ordering salads (dressing on the side, hold the cheese, etc) instead of throwing caution to the wind and eating a bacon burger with fries. I am hydrating up with water instead of lucscious glasses of fine red wines and eating big plates of fresh veggies instead of eating whatever is easy.

I think with the stress of the housing drama (seriously, our move was followed with - still is occuring- some unnecessary drama), moving houses, moving offices, the ezcema/steroids, frustration at never getting to my WW goal and gaining weight due to medication, adopting the bean, epic travels, and needing to unpack the kitchen- had me just ignoring my weight; slacking on my training; and losing focus on keeping up healthy habits.

The good news is I am way to vain to let myself not fit into my 'fat' jeans (the bigger size sixes) - so I am highly motivated to get it together again. And so I have.